Adoption Options

Been quite a while since my last posting. We've been busy & have had quite a run around with our adoption situation.

Without going into a long, drawn-out story, suffice it to say we've been going through things we thought we were done with. We've already been meeting with our children, but now this other agency told us we had to complete three things OUR agency said we didn't have to do (because we are "straight adoption" without fostering first). So we've had no option, but to begin scrambling to get them done so our kids can come to us before school begins. I return to school August 10th; the kids return on the 20th. We'd like to get all three of our sibling group situated with home & school BEFOREhand. And we still need to do school shopping.

To complicate all this, Hubby & I have been playing "bedroom shuffle". His study is going to be a bedroom for two & our new study will be in the sunroom. So I've had to stay busy cleaning out the sunroom, which was previously my teaching materials aka STORAGE. I've stopped counting bags of stuff to trash. Thanks to www.flylady.net, I'm feeling pretty good about it. Once we shift the office to the front, we have to shift Youngest Child's bedroom to the old study. He's going to share with our youngest new sibling. They are only 11 months apart. The oldest "new" sibling will get the Youngest's old room.

Have you followed that so far??!!! :-P

I hope so. I always have to stop & think it through!

One of the "no options" we had to complete was a water safety course since we have a pool. We took it at a place called "Everyday Blessings". It is a group home setting for kids 10 & under. It is a gorgeous place situated on 72 acres. Kas, it made me think of you...there were cows & horses nearby, along with a horse riding trail. Hubby & I thought... what better place for kids who are hurt & suffering! Nature was our medicine, just driving through there. And how much MORE sofor these kids who have had to be removed from their homes due to abuse & neglect. Broken bones are not new to this place, sadly enough.

We took clothes & books out there with us for the children. But we were not prepared for how much we would be moved by our short time with Everyday Blessings.  

Our instructor there was Sister Claire. She told us of a project they are working on. You've heard the adage that it takes a village to raise a child. Well, they are doing just that. They are working on The Village at Everyday Blessings, which is modeled after Generations of Hope, established more than 12 years ago in Rantoul, IL. www.generationsofhope.org

In Everyday Blessings' Village www.ebvillage.org , parents, children, & senior citizens will reside in what is known as an Intergenerational Community of Caring. It's specifically designed to meet the needs of children 8 yrs of age & older, & for large (4+) sibling groups who would otherwise have little or no chance of being adopted together. These two groups are highly representative of children most likely to languish in foster care --AND least likely to be adopted. (Hence the reason Hubby & I chose this particular age group & our sibling group to adopt.)

Parents willing to adopt four children temporarily reside, rent-free, in a seven-bedroom home. One parent is a stay-at-home parent & earns a salary. (Can't beat that, can you, Kas!?) The other parent works outside The Village. Financial planners assist the family so that, once the new family is well established (no less than 10 months), the parents have set aside the funds necessary to make a down payment on their home.

Singles & couples, ages 50+ who are willing to volunteer a minimum of eight hours a week toward the mission of The Village, pay reduced rent for a two- or three-bedroom apartment. To the parents mentioned above, the seniors of this community are mentors, listeners, and supporters. To the children, they are nurturers, tutors, cookie bakers, & so much more. To The Village, they are groundskeepers, seamstresses, administrative assistants, & community builders. Through the planning of birthday parties, holiday celebrations, and other events, the seniors help create & sustain a strong sense of community at The Village.

We don't know the requirements for the "seniors" to move in, but Hubby & I have decided we're already certainly interested. It's down the road a bit. Things are in motion for the Village. Approvals have been made by & are moving through the local government, but no new buildings are yet standing. That's the next step. Hubby & I are 55 & 44 yrs old, respectively. We figure we will be even MORE so "seniors" by the time the buildings are completed. What an awesome opportunity! What a wonderful community for children! What a beautiful place & fantastic way to make a contribution to our children!

If you would like to support Everyday Blessings in ANY way, we know they can use your help. It doesn't have to be money. Maybe you have other items you can send to help, like clothes, books, toys or gift certificates. Here is the contact info:

13113 St. Francis Lane, Thonotosassa, FL  33592

(813)982-9226, x 234

FAX: (813)986-0298

or go directly to www.ebvillage.org if you'd like to make a monetary donation. It also gives more information & tells other ways in which you can help or volunteer.

(The Villages at Everyday Blessings is a program of St. Francis Foundation, Inc., a 501 (c) (3) not-for-profit Florida Corporation. FL Solicitation #SC02875. NO PORTION of your contribution is retained by any professional solicitor.)

I did not tell Sister Claire I was writing about this. We were just so touched by her & the community that I couldn't resist telling people about it. Please consider helping if you can...and then take ACTION! Our "babies" out there really need it. Imagine if you were separated from your siblings AFTER having to leave abusive/neglectful parents. How would YOU feel?

The "medicine" is there. Let the healing begin!

 

Tags: Everyday Blessings, Generations of Hope, adoption, sibling group adoption, teen adoption

Night of the Living Dead

XXRoxyMamaXX

NOT!

I thought I knew where to begin on this one, but when you're sleep deprived, it just "ain't happenin'".

Those of you who've read my blog before know my hubby sometimes has to travel out of town. Well, lately it's not been just sometimes. Within about the last seven weeks, he's had to be gone for about five of those. It came with a merger with The Company That Must Not Be Named...huge international thingee that joined forces with his former company. They're in the middle of taking over some territories left vulnerable by the competition. My sacrifice to all this...besides NO HUBBY around...is NO SLEEP.

I don't know why it is.

Sometimes I think it is because I was the victim of violence about nine years ago. At the time I met my hubby, I had an apartment on the third floor of my complex. I felt inpenetrable...untouchable. Safe. When my hubby asked me to marry him, my only hold-out was where we would live: his home. It's in the middle of an historic district. Our home has a history over 100 years old. But it's also in the middle of an area that has more crime than I'm used to...or was at least aware of. When I hesitated, my mom pointed out that if you REALLY love someone, you'd follow them to the ends of the Earth. (Bless ya, Mom!) She was right. I excitedly called Hubby & said yes. And now, I'm on the first floor, the only floor of our home. So maybe it is this that keeps me awake when he's gone.

Other times I think it's the fact that I can't seem to shut my brain down when he isn't here to put pressure on me to go to bed. My youngest son is ADHD. My hubby has teased me about that at times; however, I don't really fit the discription. More like distracted. Difficult to focus on only one area. I'm what I proudly would call "the disorganizedly organized." Just about every teacher I know is like this. Ya know...we're the ones who look like a cyclone hit our desks. But, baby, just ask us for that one paper you need, and we know right where it's at! BINGO! Though I'm proud of who I am, I've been trying to counteract this due to the fact it's heck on everyone else around you. I mean, they just can't grasp my creativity. At least that's what the Flylady says. Thanks to Kas (Hestia Home School for Young Wild Women), I've joined the FREE online counseling of the Flylady (www.flylady.com). Every day she sends you messages of one thing you can get done and/or organized within 15 minutes. Just set the timer & ya got it. The guilt is gone! You've actually DONE SOMEthing! She even sends you an email that pops up, reminding you to go to bed and take care of yourself!!! That's right! You betcha!

Unfortunately, for me, it doesn't work. It 's just not the same as Hubby who is physically present & able to add the pressure to come to bed.

Not that that's all bad. There are definitely some distinct advantages to going to bed with him. And perhaps that is...in part...why it IS so difficult to go to bed without him. Reason #3: It just isn't the same without him.

So I come to you this morning after the night of the living dead.

It all began the same way. I couldn't sleep with him gone. He called to say good-night around 10 p.m. He was tired & had to be up early again before driving five hours to the airport and flying out today to come home. He knows how hard it is for me when he's gone. When he comes back all exhausted from the airports & meetings, he's equally joined by me. We usually collapse at whatever time it is & sleep off the effects of his work.

So Hubby told me to take some melatonin. Our ADHD son takes this. It was recommended by his doctor because HE has a hard time going to sleep, too. It's quite safe & natural. Our bodies produce it & it is what helps all of us to go to sleep. For three nights now Hubby has tried to coax me into taking it. I agreed, and had all the right intentions. But I always had "one more thing" to do before I could possibly get to it. Hence the reason I didn't get to bed last night until after 3 a.m. After I typed my blog last night (check the time), I still sat up in bed reading some materials to prepare for school next year. Finally, I forced myself to turn out the lights. Usually when this FINALLY happens, I zap out.

It wasn't to be.

There's this sunroom we have just off the dining room which is also just off our bedroom. It is going to become our new office space this week. Hubby is moving out of his current office/bedroom to give it to two of our teens with the adoption. So I'm trying to get in there to clean it up. Up to now it has been a storage room for my teaching. You name it and if it has anything to do with teaching, it's there. Any teacher who reads this will know exactly what I'm talking about. I know one gal teacher who never used her dining room since she had an eat-in kitchen. You'd never know it was a dining room. It was stacked floor to ceiling. Well, I can't yet claim that honor, but I do know the sunroom is now a storage room instead of a work place. So things need to go for it to shape up into Hubby's new office (shared with me, of course). But funny things have been going on in that room. Our little Italian greyhound has taken to parking himself outside the closed French doors leading in. He barks at it. He behaves worse at night whenever some kind of Critter seems to arrive back. Now, I'm hoping it's just a Critter and not some kind of GrrrAnimal. But I'm not one to take chances. Hubby's not here = no knight in shining armour = no way I'm gonna tackle that Critter/GrrrAnimal alone. I am NOT checking it out!

Lights go out. I go to bed & lay down.

Let the games begin.

Lenny (Italian grey) comes flying out of his bed, barking. His barking starts our other two greys barking. Lenny plants himself at the French doors in stalking mode. The other two bewildered dogs limp back to the living room, still unsure whythey joined in. "Nite-nite time" is "nite-nite time"! I scold Lenny & put him back to bed. (He HAS to be covered up, ya know, or he won't sleep. But, of course!! What were you thinking!!! How could you NOT cover him UP???!!!)

Lights out...back to bed...

and soooo it goes....

Lenny barks - everyone comes running - Lenny stalks - I scold - I cover - we're back in bed, lights out.

You DO recall I went to bed after 3 a.m., right? Our Critter Stalker routine continued for most of the rest of what I would call "dark" night. Somewhere near my "lighter-outside" night, things settled down. I imagine Lenny has worn himself out as much as he has me. FINALLY, I can get some rest. I REALLY had hoped...

Mosquitos like me. I don't know why. I don't understand why I'm always the "preferred white meat", but I am. I can be among twenty people & be the only one bitten up. I've read that it has something to do with mosquitos being able to track our carbon we put out from exhaling. Did you know that to a mosquito, when we exhale, it is like an invisible super-highway that they can detect from over 60 feet away??? Or was that 30 feet away? Maybe it also has to do with bad breath, which I'm sure I had after Lenny got through with me.

The mosquito was merciless. Everyone knows that annoying sound...that shrill mosquito buzz that makes your ears stand on end, and tells you that at any moment, the bull's-eye shall be reached! Dive bombing began. I felt like Gulliver's Travels, trapped by the Lilliputians. I tried sleeping under the covers, but between summertime in Florida and the Golden Age of Hot Flashes, I couldn't tolerate it for long. So the age-old game of "Cat & Mouse" became the new game of "Mosquito & Human".

Just when I thought I'd won, the little bugger got even LOUDER!! What in the heck..??? It took a blonde second of adjustment before realizing it was a helicopter hoovering over the interstate. The interstate isn't terribly close to our home. But you certainly would've thought sowith the sound of the helicopter. Usually this doesn't occur unless there is a severe problem on the road out there for someone.

Geez....what ELSE could happen???!!! Apparently that was the signal for every dog in the neighborhood to bark, and for mine to tell me that it was time to get up & let them go outside to "do their business". It was completed when the "ex" called to tell me he was bringing the boys over, and would I have the prescription ready he had asked me for yesterday. Yesterday??? Oh, yeah!!! I forgot. Time to go digging through the purse. Now if I'd ONLY listened to that FlyLady. Her assignment of the day was to clean out my purse.

I wonder if she has a lesson on ridding mosquitos....

Anyone got coffee???

XXRoxyMamaXX

Tags: melatonin, FlyLady

The World of Rockin' Girl Bloggers

Hmm...Don't know quite what to say. I sort of feel like I'm standing at the internet podium giving an acceptance speech for being myself.

Bea, the Wanderer, http://journals.aol.com/bgilmore725/Wanderer/ was so kind to mention me in her blog on July 10th. I am certainly honored by the nomination, but confess I didn't even realize I'd been nominated until comments were left on my journal.

Being a relative newbie to the blogging world, I actually feel nominated by the ultimate "Guru of All That's Right in Education"! Bea leaves me inspired & in awe at all she accomplishes. I often have had to turn right around to my hubby to show him her latest entries, from a bulletin board idea to poop from the sky...which I still think she hasn't figured out, if I remember correctly. (One of my all-time favs is her chronicles of her butterflies.)

Well, Bea, I feel I need to live up to "being on fire". I've been so bad at keeping up with my blog lately. However, it's due in part to a great cause. We are in the final phases of our adoption of our teens & lots remains to be done here at our home. When we finish, we will have a grand total of 10 kids & 5 grandkids, through combined marriages. And I'm STILL not sure we're finished...(right, baby??..hubby reads my blog, too.)

But without further adieu....Here are the blogs I nominate. If you are nominated, my understanding is that you continue the nominations. Copy the tag & nominate five others. Some of my choices have already been nominated. It just proves how powerful their lives and words are to those around them.

 1. Wanderer (Bea)  ...Just has to go right back to Bea. There are some blogs you just can't miss every time you know there is a posting. For me, it's Bea's. She has such compassion for her students & those around her that she knows. Top that off with her incredible curiousity & "let's-find-out" attitude & you have one of the best teachers I know!   

2. Hestia Home School for Young Wild Women (Kas) ...I love Kas 'cause she's a free spirit & down-to-Earth! She says what she thinks & feels. That's pretty much the way that I am, so I feel I can relate to her. She's also a "lifelong learner" like Bea. I enjoy all the varied tidbits about life & the world classroom that she has to share. From butterfly vulvas & Rex rats, I never know WHAT she'll have up on her blog!

3. XXRoxy MamaXX(Shelly) ...I've just recently had the chance to get to know Shelly better. I found out by happenstance that she lives in the same city I do. And she makes BEAUTIFUL tags. You can see some of them on my blog. You've got to go check out her work! I like her free spirit, too!

4. Hope Floats (Jackie) ...Would you believe that Jackie's blog is the first one I came across??!!! Thanks to her, a whole new world of friends opened up to me! She has shared her ups & downs in life. (Sometimes I think she is too hard on herself.)  I like to think she introduced me to MY "ups" here on J-Land!

5. HORSESHOE BEND (Carlene) ...Carlene was my second friend I met here. Her friendship is important to me because she often reminds me to be thankful for the Love of My Life & to care about the small things. She shares her feelings about her husband & what he meant to her. His passing has led her into a new phase in her life, and I feel I'm learning so much from her because of how she deals with it.

6. LivinginSavannah2 (Gretchen) ...Gretchen taught me how to be more thankful with her Thursday list. She really makes me stop & think with the use of her gentle spirit. And it doesn't hurt that she lives in one of my favorite areas, near my honeymoon spot (Tybee Island)!! ha!

7. I Shaved My Legs for This (Kim) ...No list seems complete without mentioning Kimberleigh. Ravin', shavin' Kim blows me away with her courage & Irish spirit. No one I know has ever gone into full-blown battle with cancer with such spitfire...TWICE!! And boy, does she make you laugh!! How she comes up with some of her spicy descriptions is beyond me!

I know that the informal rule here seems to be that only five people can be nominated. Some...or maybe even most...of mine have already been nominated. But I don't know how to narrow the list down. All of mine are on equal & deserving footing. They are all so very strong in so many different ways. They are mentors, girlfriends, consolers, teachers, counselors, jesters...they are strong, yet gentle...meek, yet confident. They have "overcome"! And did I happen to mention that most are free spirits??!!!

Gotta love women who know who they are, what they want, & how to speak up!

I agree with Bea...and glad to find out there are....rockin' male bloggers. But for now...

HERE'S TO THE GIRLS....diverse, but as one.

Tags: rockin' girl blogger, Hope Floats, Horseshoe Bend, LivinginSavannah2, Wanderer, Hestia Home School for Wild Women, XXRoxyMamaXX, I Shaved My Legs for This

Busy, Busy, Busy...and Lazy!

Been a while since I posted anything. Something like 10 days, I think. I've been alternating between busy & lazy...if there IS such a mix.

The boys want to do something every day now that we are out of school. I'm a "stay-at-home" body. I have to be so much "on the clock" with scheduling while school is in session. I'd be happy if all I had to do was read, knit, and read some more, and piddle around the house. Not that I'm back knitting. Just that I should be. I've always got this "to do" list in my head, & of course, everything seems to be "top priority", so I usually don't feel like I've accomplished very much. Especially when you add in the "everyday" chores, like dishes & laundry. But I need to get crackin' because we still don't have our new children & we still don't have all the rooms ready. Part of the reason is that I want the kids to be able to make decisions regarding their rooms. For instance, our daughter will have a choice of white furniture or brown furniture. We feel like it's her room & she should make some choices, especially since it's what she will be living in day to day. Same goes for our new sons. We already have a very nice bed for one of them, but not the other. We still have to buy one more. Since they'll share a room we figure they can share beds, too, if they prefer to switch around. Anybeehooova, that still leaves getting rooms cleaned & prepared. Hubby's office will become the boys' room, so he'll have to move into my office/storage space. That's gonna take some doing. We may have to have one of our oldest sons come home with some of his friends to help out with the moving.

Meanwhile, Hubby is on vacation this week. We don't have anything major planned. It already began, though, on Friday. We left out for our hotel in Crystal River Beach Park, FL, about an hour & a half from here. Saturday morning started out with the indescribable. A HUGE full moon glowing a light orange & hanging just over the beach. There are no words I can think of to show you the picture I now have in my head of the entire setting. I was thrilled that I got to share it with my Hubby. Just the two of us. It was gorgeous! 

 Hubby was in the second of a series of three triathlons being held there at the beach. I always get so tickled with my Hubby & his races. He's so hard on himself to do better. He just wanted to shave some time off this time from his last race there. So he worked hard & shaved time off of the swimming & the biking. However, the running took longer. When he got back, he had added approximately 2 minutes to his previous race time. He was pretty aggrevated. I just smiled, but wanted to laugh. To me it's a BIG deal he's even doing these races AND completing them! If it were me, I'd probably drown in the first leg of the competition. Swim a quarter mile, bike 17 miles, and run 3.1 miles. Yeah...right. I've only just gone back to working out & I overheat on 3 minutes running straight. HA! He should be so proud of himself. He's now done a marathon (try 21+ miles of running!), and several triathlons and 5Ks. I'M so proud of him, even if HE is not recognizing this accomplishment enough! Take that & the added benefit that he just looks so darn sexy from it, too! :-)

So that's how his vacation started. Then we relaxed on the beach for a little bit after the race. From there we drove back & showered & went out to lunch. Crystal River has two wonderful seafood restaurants. One is Crackers & the other is called Charlie's.

Charlie's was just ranked number one in the area for food & service,  and we could see why. Besides the seafood they also had fried ice cream for dessert with some ice cream combos that were good ideas. We chose to split the apple pie fried ice cream. Delicious with chunks of real apple in it.

Crackers appeals to us because it has indoor AND outdoor dining. The outdoor dining is on a huge deck with a tiki bar overlooking the river. Very calming & relaxing. I'm always tempted to get some kind of frozen banana drink concoction, but so far I've resisted. Maybe I won't next time.

On the drive home we decided to stop & see the new Pixar movie, Rattatouie. I'm sure I've spelled that wrong (important to a teacher..ha). It was a cute little movie, though longer than I anticipated. I believe I timed it to be 1 hour, 50 minutes. But I love Pixar movies & I'd sit through it regardless.

Afterwards we called my MIL to borrow theirlawn mower. Ours needs a repair. My MIL is the sweetest woman & has the funniest & sometimes most unbelievable stories to tell, as does her husband. She invited us to stay to dinner. She'd made a homemade pizza. I don't think I've ever had a bad dish from my MIL. In fact, she's hard to beat when it comes to cooking...and you know the old adage: if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. So I get some really good recipes from her. My only regret is that my Hubby's family is Northern, so they don't really appreciate Southern cooking. Hubby thinks a lot of what we consider normal food to taste odd or yucky, and my cooking never comes quite up to par to my MIL's. NOT that my Hubby complains, and he DOES like some things I cook. He's so sweet about that. He'll never say he doesn't like something I've made. He usually just has a slight smile & finds something nice he can say about it...like, "interesting taste, honey".  I've never met someone so picky in all my life, so when my MIL calls, I'm grateful that he gets to enjoy her cooking again. We also have a really good time talking & laughing about things.

So thanks to a triathlon, a couple of seafood restaurants, a movie, and the in-laws, we're off to a nice holiday. Hubby would like to return to the Kennedy Space Center. So I think we're doing that one day, and we'll return to the in-laws for Fourth of July lunch. But I think for once Hubby would like to feel like he got some rest. Perhaps some of that stems from the fact he's had to travel for most of the last 5 weeks with his work.

Either way it is our last vacation together where it is quiet & just the two of us before we add to our already large & extended family. I think we're happy & determined to enjoy it & one another...

 as I hope all of you will do over the Fourth of July holiday, too.

Tags: Crystal River Beach Park, Crackers Seafood Restaurant, Charlie's Seafood Restaurant, triathlons, marathons, 5Ks